Taking My Breasts Back (pt. 2)

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Posted by Keith | Posted in Advice, Family, Fefe, KayKay | Posted on 24-09-2014

 

There's Still Milk In There

There’s Still Milk In There

Apparently, “check back tomorrow” means see you in a month, because it was a little over a month ago that I promised you guys Part 2, the thrilling conclusion to our “Taking My Breasts Back” story.  I know that you guys are probably sitting there waiting for whatever lame excuse I try to use to explain my bad blogger behavior, but I’ve got news for you guys, this time there are no excuses, only facts.  The factual (proven through scientific experimentation) reason that its taken so long to get this blog post out is because unbeknownst to me,  I got sucked into some type of time warp that transported me through the space-time continuum in slow motion. I promise you, it was very Inception-ish, so in your minds, it may seem like an entire month has gone by, but in reality it has only been 24 hours since my last post (please disregard all time stamps and any other evidence that refutes my claims).  So now that we’re all back together again ONE DAY later, why don’t we just jump right into the story and find out if I got my boobs back or if they’re still under the control of that dastardly (but cute) little monster called KayKay.

Taking My Breasts Back

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Posted by Keith | Posted in Advice, Fefe, KayKay | Posted on 11-08-2014

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Yes, I am taking a stand and finally fighting for what’s rightfully mine. I’m taking my breasts back! Technically they aren’t my breasts per se, since they are attached to Fefe’s body and all, but we are married and what’s hers is ours, so legally they belong to me. Just trust me on this one folks, I’ve consulted a crack team of lawyers regarding personal property law & the firm’s most seasoned partner, a fellow by the name of Tre ensured me that I’m well within my rights.

If Loving You Is Wrong

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Posted by Keith | Posted in Baby Guppy, KayKay, Tre | Posted on 24-04-2014

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When we have children, we hope and pray that they live healthy, successful, and joyful lives. We hope they have tons of friends and are well liked, we hope that they accomplish all of their desires and dreams and we also hope that they love themselves as well as each other. Our family is pretty lucky, we’ve been blessed with 3 beautiful children who are having no problems at all achieving most of the bucket list items that I listed in the previous sentence. I say “most” because for some reason, we just can’t seem to get the whole “love thy neighbor” concept to properly take hold for our kids: and by “neighbor” I mean sibling and by “kids” I mean Tre. Tre just can’t seem to find that middle of the road balance, he’s either one extreme or the other. It’s black and white with this kid, where grey is apparently some abstract concept reserved for philosophers and others of such caliper. Previously, I wrote about the vicious battles between Tre and Ty, at times I think these two hate each other. But today, I bring you a very different tale, the flip side of the coin if you will; Tre loves his sister so much, that it is in fact quite sickening and boarding on illegal in 48 states.

Baby’s ‘Big Brother’ Must Be Stopped

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Posted by Keith | Posted in Baby Guppy, KayKay | Posted on 05-02-2014

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I hate baby monitors!!! What happened to the good old days, when if a baby wasn’t loud enough to be heard through two sets of closed doors and a flight of stairs, then there was nothing wrong with them? I attribute all the ills of this world that have been perpetrated by generation Z on baby monitors! They are the culprit, they are to blame, and they should be banned worldwide. I refuse to play big brother, constantly keeping an watchful eye over all of my child’s actions, any longer.